this is like my fave joke
okay that shit was good.
"Just get in the car, Alice. I’ll explain on the way."
when you see ur squad while you out with your parents
- Go to bed earlier
- Finish things ahead of time
- Eat whole-food
- Be present
- Listen to music
- Think positively
- Drink lots of water
- Be productive
- Eat fresh fruit
- Breathe deeply
- Go for a bike ride
when attractive people say they are ugly
Today this girl in class looked different because she had straightened her hair and I told her it was so pretty and straight and she goes “unlike me”. So me thinking that she has bad self esteem, I say “don’t say that. You’re pretty.” To which she replies “oh no, im pretty. I’m just not straight.” And I shit you not my stomach still hurts from laughing too hard.
So apparently no one should ever buy sugarless Haribo gummy bears
Fun fact: I once bought sugar free gummy bears.
This is exactly what happened
Petition for Youtubers to start doing the “Sugarless Gummy Bear Challenge”
FINALLY I FIND THIS SO I CAN SHOW THE WORLD THIS HAS TO BE SEEN
my cousins ate a bunch of these once and got sick as hell
my mom told me it’s because they ate too much candy
now i know it was a LIE
I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD AT WHAT WAS ESSENTIALLY A POOP JOKE
Jan 10th, 2014. We did this in the ER because everyone who works in the ER is 6 yrs old. It takes about 2-3 hrs before you begin to feel like you are straight up going to shit your pants. I was on the toilet for an hour. Then I tried to take a shower. I shat myself in the shower.
It was the funniest thing I will ever fucking do.
It only takes a handful.
THIS IS HILARIOUS